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Police – Blogoff Round 2

March 28, 2007
“Open up! It’s the pi-igs!”


One of my favourite episodes of The Young Ones is Cash, when Rik, Mike and Vyvyan make hippie Neil get a job to support the household, so he becomes a policeman complete with baton and walkie talkie. He is called to bust a party at his friends’ house and the scene where he knocks on the door, calling out ‘Open up! It’s the pi-igs!’ and then half-heartedly raids the place, while warning his friends to flush their stash still makes me giggle now.

I had a run in with the police when I was nineteen. I jumped into the neighbour’s pool at nine o’clock on a sultry summer evening and the sticky beaks across the road called the cops. I had permission to used the pool while my neighbours were away. But I guess that permission did not extend to my numerous friends at night. So the police turned up and asked us to vacate the pool but my then-boyfriend (who was much older) gave them a bit of lip, so they asked him for i.d and gave him the third degree.

It’s funy how portrayals of police on television can influence your expectations. One evening I was home alone when I saw the police walking up my driveway. My partner was away interstate, so I immeicatly thought the worst — that the police were coming to inform me that he’d had an accident. But no — they were looking for the guy who lived next door, because he’d been up to no good. I was more relieved to know that my partner was okay than to worry about living next door to a potential fugitive.

One night I was delivering pizzas, and was pulled over for a breath test.
‘Have you had a drink today?’ asked the young constable.
‘I’m working,’ I replied. ‘I don’t drink while I’m working. What about you?’
(hah, I was a bit cheeky in my youth)
‘No, I don’t,’ he said, and promptly breathalysed himself to prove it.
‘Now it’s your turn,’ he said, after he replaced the pipe.
Lucky I was telling the truth!

This is Round 2 of the Blog-off organised by Courtney of Five Second Dance Party. Last week, we sadly saw Super Duper Fantastic and Motivated Motion eliminated. If you would like to make a donation to the cause, click on the link.

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